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from: The Cup of Trembling
'Thou hast drunken the dregs of the cup of trembling, and wrung them out' Isaiah 51. 17

Habeas Corpus

 

The judge rejected the writ

And reproved the temerity of the lawyers.

 

It is, after all, irrelevant,

this insistence….

 

One must discourage the spanners

of quixotic absurdity

thrown into the relentless

workings of the Process.

 

Bodies sealed in metal

or weighted in concrete

are quite evidently

beyond the Law.

 

 

Hunger


Over there was the dump

where at night they came

and flung the bodies,

covering them hurriedly

under fifteen centimetres

of earth. They smelt

in the Summer heat.

 

The people lived

with the smell.

They knew.

They said nothing.

 

But when the rains washed

the earth away,

a hand stuck out,

an arm, the torso

of a man.

 

In the afternoon

they heard

sharp teeth tearing,

the sound of teeth rending,

clamping jaws gnawing

on liver and heart -

They go for the entrails first.

They dragged their trophies

back to the huts of tin

and sacking, among which

they prowled, scavenging,

always hungry.

 

The people squatting outside

stared emptily at first

into the hunk of meat

and bone, as the mangy bitch

cracked her teeth into the

soft cartilage of the skull -

one year old,

tender and rotting.

 

A young boy shouted,

threw a hard clod of earth,

frightened her off.

She started away and stopped,

snarled, and looked back

hungrily.

 

Shouting hoarsely

to ward off the others,

he brought a piece of sacking,

picked up the skull spilling

its small brains, torn face,

Burst eye jelly -

Retched once, twice,

three times -

Not much to bring up,

only the green mate meant

to keep the stomach

from growling.

 

HUNGER(Cont.)

 

He walked slowly,

turning his nose away,

towards the police station.

The people watched him go,

their eyes dark, arms listless.

 

The police took

the sackcloth bundle.

- Que fiambrecito! - they said,

opening it.

Gone off, all right.

Some tart, who did in her brat.

They shrugged.

 

The boy waited.

- And now get the hell

out of it, they said.

Understand?

 

 

Ab Aliena


I have eaten of the fruit

of the tree -

 

I have drunk

one sip from the cup -

and seen the spider,

Bergman's god,

lucidly

through a glass -

having put away

the things of a child -

the small security,

and raised my ostrich head at last

and seen the nails -

to pierce

not swallow,

bitter to the taste.

 

Peccavi -

I know now what the psalmist meant:

Et ab aliena parce servum tuum - aliena

They are occultis meis

visited upon me -

aliena.

 

 

Confiteor

 

We have kept silent.

We have pretended we did not know.

We have lied

to ourselves and to others.

 

We have witnessed

the attrition

of facts,

of our only selves -

 

Not suddenly, violently,

but slowly,

day after eroded day,

gnawed at

by the little rat lies,

the scuttering, squeaking

compromises,

the feed trough satiety -

 

Until our truth has crumbled

quite away -

And now we know

that four and four

make five.

 

 

 

 

 

Hoc Est Corpus

 

Or if a boot bursts an eyeball

which splits like a blood-filled grape -

 

They do not know whose blood

runs on the tiles

in the glaring light.

 

Dissociated from

the blood-stained fingerprints,

the leaders are untroubled

by identity -

Photographed

opening their mouths

to receive - all unawares -

the mangled body.

 

For inasmuch…

 

 

The Visitation


Because they had connections

powerful - in the highest quarters -

After many months when they had knocked,

begged, implored -

driven mad and wild and listless by turns

with uncertainty

and despair

 

Azrael

came one night

out of uniform

faultlessly suited,

grave, correct,

to say

 

- Do not seek your daughter

among the living,

for she is dead.

 

Some cord snapped in the father's neck

and his head fell forward

where he sat.

 

But the mother rose up

drawing the fullness of that death

into herself,

as once the red network of her veins

had fed the life.

 

- I understand, she said.

It is finished.

But I demand my daughter's body

to lay it in the family vault

with all the others of her blood.

  

The Visitation (cont.)

 

- Impossible.

The plainclothes messenger

strove to conceal his irritation

at the necrophilic obsession.

 

He had been constrained

by her unprocessed habits of thought

to use the word.

 

For hadn't they

eliminated death

together with the body

that died,

the person that had never been.

 

So -

there being nothing else to say

 

Azrael bowed

and went away.

  

 

 

Lord Siva, the Destroyer


Lord Siva, the Destroyer,

 

Do not,

 

Oh, do not let the sons return

until you have blinded

the mothers

and destroyed their hands,

their sense of touch.

 

For even without her eyes

a mother's hands would know.

 

One did return -

dead

 

(the planned destruction of the corpse

having misfired)

 

and the young man

tall and broad

who disappeared out of the sunlight

fourteen days before -

 

lay shrunk to a raw cinder,

seared from head to foot

with livid wounds,

the smashed testicles hidden

under the strangeness of the white shroud -

 

Beside whose coffin

the mother sat -

staring and staring

into the vacancy

of what had been his face.

 

Now rousing herself

to lay a finger

gently on the raw welts,

 

trembling

lest she hurt

 

unable to believe

her hands had no longer

any power to heal

 

beyond the barrier

of electric fire.


Obituary

 

She was five months old,

She owned

a pair of pink nylon pyjamas,

a plastic comforter

and the daylight.

 

They found

the plastic comforter

and the nylon pyjamas

(synthetic materials do not easily rot)

when, watched by her grandparents,

they dug the bones up

out of the nameless grave.

 

There was a bullet hole

in the skull.

Her brother and sister's skulls

had bullet holes too

- and her mother's -

but her father's head

had been blown off,

when at ten o'clock that night

they blasted their way

into her home

with guns and mortars

and hand grenades.

 

  

'Once the action was over it was found that

 inside the building there were five dead

 terrorists as yet unidentified….

 The military forces taking part suffered

 no losses.'

 

                Communiqué No….

                Command Zone No…

 

 


Because they had connectionspowerful - in the highest quarters -After many months when they had knocked,begged, implored -driven mad and wild and listless by turnswith uncertaintyand despairAzraelcame one nightout of uniformfaultlessly suited,grave, correct,to say- Do not seek your daughteramong the living,for she is dead.Some cord snapped in the father's neckand his head fell forwardwhere he sat.But the mother rose updrawing the fullness of that deathinto herself,as once the red network of her veinshad fed the life.- I understand, she said.It is finished.But I demand my daughter's bodyto lay it in the family vaultwith all the others of her blood.The Visitation (cont.)- Impossible.The plainclothes messengerstrove to conceal his irritationat the necrophilic obsession.He had been constrainedby her unprocessed habits of thoughtto use the word.For hadn't theyeliminated deathtogether with the bodythat died,the person that had never been.So -there being nothing else to sayAzrael bowedand went away.